Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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