if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
