Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
