he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
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