wakey wakey hands off snakey
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
