I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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