whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize