you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
