Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize