fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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