Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED

(1-603): View more from New Hampshire

I feel like half our conversations start this way.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.

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(435): View more from Utah

He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.

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(432): View more from Texas

There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!

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(309): View more from Illinois

Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.

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(907): View more from Alaska

Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room

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(478): View more from Georgia

Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?

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(917): View more from New York City

Wtf did i hit my head on?

(914): View more from New York

Tequila

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