did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
