insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
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