And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize