i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
