My friends, they love my intelligence
Plan B is the new Plan A
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I want to be your penis for a week.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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