Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize