those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
