So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
