you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
When are your genitals available?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
