If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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