Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Randomize
