You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
