you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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