just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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