WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
