Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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