They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
