I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Randomize
