i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
