I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
