How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
