I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
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