i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize