I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He better not be in your backpack
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
