Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
