You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Boobs are out for the taking
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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