Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
its liver damage thursday
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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