I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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