This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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