at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Randomize