he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
