it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize