you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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