So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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