We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
