You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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