My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
