Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
