You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Randomize
